Here are 3 people to stay away from:
- The Spectator
- The Hater
- The Complainer
Do you know who the football
coach never invites into the locker room for some advice during
halftime? The spectators. The wide receiver never runs into the stand
and asks for feedback from someone sitting in the 10th row.
Why? Because spectators aren’t on the field. They aren’t playing. They’re watching other people do it.
What does that mean for you? It means you need to ignore the person who hates your blog but doesn’t have their own.
They’re just a spectator. Their hands aren’t dirty. Their knowledge has
not been paid for with experience. Ignore them. Instead, get feedback
from other bloggers, other people who are in the trenches where you are.
It’s time to require the “squeaky
wheel gets the oil” theory. For years it caused many of us to ignore
the people who liked our dream in order to focus our energy on the
people who hated it. (I call this theory, “Critic’s Math,”
which is “1 insult + 1,000 compliments = 1 insult.” We have the ability
to receive 1,000 compliments and ignore them in the face of 1 insult.)
The truth is, you should never
waste time trying to turn someone who hates you into someone who likes
you. Instead focus on turning people who like your dream into people who
love your dream.
So how do you know who a hater is? Simple, someone who hates on something without a solution to make it better is a hater.
If they don’t have a fix, an idea, a spark of improvement, they’re just
there to hate. That’s one of the main differences between hate and
feedback.
Feedback’s goal is to cause improvements. Hate’s goal is to cause wounds. Let them go.
A complainer is someone who won’t respond when you attempt to fix a problem.
For example, let’s say you strongly disagree with something I wrote on
my blog and I ask you a clarifying question. If you don’t respond,
you’re a complainer.
If you respond, you’re a
conversationalist and we can talk. That’s completely different. We can
debate. We can go back and forth until we might even reach a resolution.
That’s the beauty of the Internet, a simple question can clarify so
many of the nuances that can be misinterpreted.
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